


Nightmares and Adagios

by Ilovethings_somuch



Category: Avengers, Bucky Barnes - Fandom, Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Steve Rogers - Fandom, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-11
Updated: 2018-03-11
Packaged: 2019-03-29 18:09:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13932465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ilovethings_somuch/pseuds/Ilovethings_somuch
Summary: When (y/n) buys a piano for her room in the Avengers Compound, she wasn’t expecting the amount of attention it would attract from a specific avenger.





	Nightmares and Adagios

**Author's Note:**

> So this is an idea I’ve had ever since I first saw some gifs from Political Animals of Sebastian at a piano. I didn’t give the reader any specific characteristics other than they know a lot about music, which I know not everyone has that knowledge but nonetheless I hope people enjoy this.

When I asked Tony if I could put a piano in my room, I had no idea the effect it would have on the people around me. When Nat and Wanda found out I could play that’s all they wanted me to do. They would find random songs on the internet and make me learn them or buy sheet music to their favorite songs and ask me to play it for them. I didn’t mind, really, but sometimes I prefer to play by myself. It’s always my favorite way to de-stress. I can’t think about how I messed up on the last mission or how easily Nat took me down in training or about how devastatingly handsome Bucky is when I’m zoned in on a song.

There is one other good thing all this attention from the piano has brought on, and that would be Bucky. Bucky and I have had a weird relationship that past couple months. When he finally came out of his shell a little bit, all the Avengers were happy to have him. It wasn’t long before he seemed like just another member of the team, he would joke around and train just as hard as everyone else during the day, but the nights were different.

Each avenger shared a wing with another Avenger, and Bucky was my wing partner. Steve practically begged me to switch with him, but there was no way I was living in the same wing as Vision. Besides, I think it’s good for Bucky to be away from Steve every once in a while. Unfortunately, I started to regret that decision after the first couple nights. Every night, sometimes multiple times a night, Bucky was waking up with nightmares. I tried to ignore it at first, thinking maybe he just had to get used to his new room, but after a week I couldn’t take it. I was finally able to build up my courage one night when his screaming just wouldn’t stop. I slid out of bed and went across the hall to his room. By the time I convinced myself to just open the door he must have woken up, for the screaming finally ceased. Unfortunately, it was too late for me to escape. Bucky must have heard the door open and he came out of the bedroom glistening with sweat.

“I’m sorry, I should have knocked or something it’s just you were shouting and I didn’t know if you were okay and I-”

“(y/n),” Bucky interrupts me, “It’s okay, I should be the one apologizing, for waking you up.”

“Oh, that’s okay,” I mumble and we both stand in the dark awkwardly looking each other over. “Is there anything I can do?” I finally blurt out. “You know, to help with the nightmares.”

“Um, I don’t think so to be honest.”

“Okay. If you ever think of something, anything, I can do to help, please don’t be afraid to ask.”

“Of course, thank you, (y/n).” He reached out and pulled me into a sort of half hug before I returned to my own room.

After that, I didn’t know what to do. He told me I couldn’t help, but I also couldn’t stand to just let him suffer every night. I was still having this dilemma when I got my piano. It was a baby grand, and even being a baby it took up a good portion of my living room and weighed a ton. Bucky and Steve were the ones who helped me bring it up to my room. That also means they were the first to request I play them a song. I tried to pick sometimes from their time, before the war, and they both smiled when they recognized the melody. Steve got called away after the first song, but Bucky hung around a little longer.

“I haven’t heard someone play like that since, well, since before the war. It almost makes me want to go dancing,” he smiles.

“I’ve heard you were quite the dancer, quite the ladies man too,” I say with a playful smirk.

“What, does Steve tell everyone about that?” I respond with a shrug and he blushes. “It’s really cool that you can play though, it’s something I always envied as a kid.”

“Really? Hotshot Bucky Barnes wanted to play the piano?”

“That would’ve really gotten the ladies,” he winks before laughing. “Yeah, it’s just one of those things.”

“One of what things?”

“Those things that take me back, one of those things that reminds me I’m not that person anymore.”

“I’m sorry, Bucky,” I start.

“No, really it’s not a bad thing. It was really nice to hear you play,” he says before heading towards the door. I try to think of something to say to stop him, but he’s gone before I get the chance.  
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Knowing from experience how thin the walls seem to be in our wing I do my best to play quietly, but on more than one occasion Bucky has wandered into my room while I’m playing just to sit and listen. The first time he barely got in the door and stayed leaning next to it the whole time. The next couple time he made his way into the living room and sat on the couch behind me. Then one day he stood up from the couch and leaned over the top of the piano, his eyes never leaving my hands. When I finished the song he finally looked up at my face and I saw the softest smile I’ve ever seen.

“Do you remember when you told me if I ever thought of something that might help with the nightmares, I should just ask you?”

“Of course.”

“Well, I was thinking, you mentioned how playing the piano is a good stress relief for you, so I thought maybe if I could play and have that stress relief, I might be able to sleep better,” he rambles on.

“I think that’s a great idea Buck. So you want me to teach you?”

“If you want to,” he says hurriedly.

“I’d love to.”

“You’re just saying that cuz if I stop having nightmares you’ll be able to sleep better,” he teases.

“Hey who are you to complain about my motives?”  
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

We get started on his lessons right away. I pick up some beginner books at the music store and start going through the basics. First, he needs to know how to read music. He’s able to pick up treble clef pretty quickly though he does have some grievances with the musical alphabet.

“But why does it stop at G? There are more keys, shouldn’t each key have its own letter?”

“There aren’t that many letters Bucky and it stops at G because there are seven different notes in an octave.”

“What’s an octave?”

“It’s like middle C to high C, like this,” I demonstrate by playing the two notes. “See how the sounds are in line with each other?”

“No,” he deadpans and I sigh.

“Okay so play middle C and the D right next to it,” he does so but quickly pulls back with a wince.

“Why did you make me do that?”

“Oh good, you’re not tone deaf,” I tease. “That’s called dissonance, it’s great in the right situation, but it’s supposed to hurt. Now play middle C and E.” he places his fingers over the keys and braces himself before pushing them down.

“Oh that’s much better,” he breathes a sigh of relief.

“It’s great right? That’s called harmony, two different tones that compliment each other. But do you hear how that’s different from when you played the two C’s?”

“Kind of,” he plays the C’s again before going back to the C and E. “Yeah, that’s different.”

“That’s because the C’s are the same note, they just have a different frequency.”

“Okay. I think I get it.”

I gave him a couple songs to play that were single line melodies and only used the treble clef. He seemed reluctant to put his metal hand anywhere near the keys, so I figured this was a good start. I started finding Bucky in my room so often that I started joking about having to get him his own piano. Though I secretly didn’t mind spending so much time with him. By the time we were a couple weeks into our lessons, Bucky was feeling very comfortable with his right hand and I started getting him to understand bass clef.

“But why doesn’t it start on E like the other one?”

“Because it’s not the same, think of it more as like an extension. See if I drew in another line in the middle.”

“Middle C,” Bucky commented and I noticed the proud smile he had when I told him he was right.

“See so this is middle C on treble and this is middle C on bass. Does that make sense?” I check and he nods.

“So if you want to, you can just remember that this is C and go down from there, or you can remember that this line between the two lines is F or I remember by doing the FACE thing I taught you for treble, but remember it’s a skip down.” I wrote the note name of each line and space at the beginning of his first two-handed song and he slowly nodded at it before tentatively placing his hands on the keys. He got his right-hand set before awkwardly placing his left hand on the keys.

“Relax your hand,” I remind him and put my hand on top of his prosthetic one. He tenses slightly under my touch but I try to ignore it as I help him set his fingers over the correct keys. “It’s going to be weird and probably impossible to immediately jump in with two hands, so maybe try to play just the bass clef first, okay?”

He gave me a small nod of understanding before bringing his right hand back down to his lap. I noticed him bite down on his bottom lip and squinting at the music in front of him.

“You can do it, Buck,” I try to give him a little more encouragement and he finally puts enough pressure down on his pointer finger to make a sound. He starts pushing down his ring finger but does it so slowly that the hammer doesn’t hit the strings hard enough to make a sound and he has to do it again. “Just do the first line and then play it again,” I tell him and he nods without taking his eyes off the music. It takes him a while, but he eventually gets to the end of the first system and goes back to the beginning. After playing it through about 5 times he starts to get it up to tempo and I tell him to add in his right hand. “Just take it one note at a time. Don’t worry about how fast you play it just make sure you’re hitting the right notes.” The first time through he plays the first note on his right hand and then the first note on his left hand instead of playing both at the same time and I have to really control myself to keep in my giggles. “Bucky, you see how these notes line up?” I ask and draw a line straight down from the treble clef note to the bass clef note.

“Yeah?” he says it like a question and this time I do giggle.

“That means they should be played at the same time.”

“Oh. God this is hard,” he sighs and looks at me.

“It’s a lot, I know. Maybe we should call it a day?”

“But I just feel like I’m so close,” he says with a sort of groan.

“Okay, I’ll give you three more chances and then I’m cutting you off,” I tease.

“What do I get if I do well?” he smirks.

“You think you get something? What do I get for teaching you all this?” I counter.

“The satisfaction of helping a friend,” he says with a cheesy grin.

“Yeah, okay,” I snort. “Okay, if you play it to my satisfaction I’ll play you any song you’d like.”

“You do that anyway,” he reminds me.

“Fine, you pick. What do you want?”

“Dinner,” he says simply.

“What, like I buy you a pizza?”

“No, (y/n), go to dinner with me.”

“Like-”

“A date? Yeah. If you want.”

“I’d love to Bucky.”  
___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

We did go on a date. And one date turned into many and before I knew it my room became mine and Bucky’s room and Bucky became mine.

I don’t know if it had something to do with the super serum, or if it’s just the way his mind works, but once Bucky understood the basics of reading music he started to surpass my own skills. He started picking up music at the local shop that was more and more complex, going from Mozart For Beginners to actual Mozart and things like Mendelssohn’s Sonata in B flat Major in what seemed like a matter of days. Though, considering he spent most of his free time at the piano, it made sense for him to advance quickly.

Once he got used to the feel of the keys, using his left hand didn’t seem to bother him anymore. Though there were still days when he would only play simple tunes with his right hand. On those days I would sit on the bench next to him and hold his metal hand in my lap and play with his fingers the same way I would with his flesh hand. He was usually good at playing through my distractions, but I could usually work a smile out of him by kissing each finger and down his palm. Sometimes I would just hold his left hand in my right one while playing the left-hand part for him. He liked when I did that, and I think that’s why he picked some of his easier music to play on those days.

I used to think that if Bucky had someone to sleep with he would be able to sleep better, and it did help, but sometimes it just wasn’t enough. He didn’t wake up screaming very often anymore, but he would still wake up. He was so smooth that sometimes I wouldn’t even notice and I would only realize later if I woke up and he was gone. Other times I would only notice when I would feel him get back in bed in the early hours of the morning. Other nights I would know because I would be woken up by the sound of music filtering through the walls from the living room. I honestly think he tries to play soft, but sometimes you just lose yourself in the music and don’t realize how loud you’re being. I learned the hard way that if I get out of bed he’ll stop. He’ll apologize in a whispered voice, a stark contrast to the volume the piano was at, and take me back to bed. If it meant he would go back to sleep too, then I would do it, but instead, he just lays awake until morning. I started just staying in bed and listening. He always plays better at night for some reason, and sometimes I would tease him that he just stayed awake to get more practice.

Everyone in the tower noticed the change playing piano had on Bucky. He was always an easy guy to be around, but even so, he became less tense and more social. He was also very proud of himself. There were a few occasions where he invited Steve over to play him a song from before the war and other occasions where he’d invite a bunch of people into our room to play them the new song he mastered. Everyone was really happy for him too, Steve and I probably more so than most.

Even with his occasional concerts and midnight jam sessions, his favorite time to play was after dinner as the sun was setting behind the compound and the light in the living room was dimming. It was an old habit of mine that Bucky picked up on. After dinner, we go to the piano. Sometimes I would play, sometimes he would, and sometimes we would pick something from the stack of duet books we have. It was our favorite way to unwind from the day and be close to each other.

“That one’s my favorite,” I tell Bucky after we play the closing chords of a duet.

“Really?”

“Yeah, it just makes me reflect in a way.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, I love playing any duet with you, but I love that in this one both of our melodies sound good alone, but they also sound like their missing one little thing until you put them together. It’s like us, we’re okay alone, but we’re so much better together.” I explain to Bucky and he breaks into a bashful smile by the end of my explanation.

“We are so much better together. I love you”

“I love you,” I echo and lean in to capture his lips in a kiss.


End file.
